not as sleepy as you seem
by AtLoLevad
Summary: Poe loves to watch the baby sleep. Rey finds him in the nursery


You're supposed to sleep when the baby sleeps, Poe knows. He's been given that piece of advice from multiple sources - his father, the holonet, Kalonia - and yet.

And yet, Poe can't stop waking in the middle of the night to creep into the nursery and watch Bey sleep.

It's 0237 according to the chrono on his side table and Rey's long passed out, snoring like a happabore, with her limbs spread haphazardly across the bed. Her foot rests up against his shin and the blankets are tangled around her. Poe tucks the blanket a little more securely around her body and carefully, quietly climbs out of bed. Rey's breathing hitches and Poe pauses, but her snores start back up and he sighs in relief. Just because he's an idiot who can't go twenty minutes without looking at their newborn son doesn't mean Rey has to wake up more than she already does.

The nursery is dark, but the slight glow from the stars painted on the ceiling offers Poe enough visibility to tiptoe over to the crib without walking into anything. He leans his forearms against the railing and looks down at the baby.

Bey's four months old as of last Primeday and Poe honestly can't remember a time in his life without the baby. It's incredible, how their lives had shifted so that Bey was the center, the most important thing, and how little everything else mattered.

The baby lets out a soft sigh and Poe grins. Everything Bey does is adorable - not that he and Rey are biased or anything - and it's hard to resist the temptation to take a holovid of every moment. That's probably why Poe likes to watch the baby in the middle of the night. Everything is quiet and he can just breathe and savor Bey's infancy, when he knows time will fly by.

Poe reaches down and touches Bey's palm with his index finger, enjoying the way the baby's tiny fingers reflexively curl and grip it. He could stand like this forever.

"_Te amo mucho_," Poe whispers in Yavinese, watching the way Bey's eyelids flutter and his little mouth purses. "I'll go to the ends of the galaxy to protect you, Bey."

The dark, even dark broken by artificially lit up stars, still suffocates Poe sometimes. It allows his mind to wander to the places that are easier to forget about in the light. He still has nightmares - they both do - when he does manage to sleep. The Dreadnaught, Crait, Kylo Ren. All his failures invade his mind when he least expects them.

His failures, his losses - Leia, Han, Luke, Holdo, Snap. All the sacrifices that people made so Poe could live.

He looks down at Bey and the crushing grief isn't so crushing anymore. Their sacrifices were for a better galaxy, a safer galaxy for the next generation, one that Poe is going to make sure remains peaceful.

Bey makes a snuffling noise and waves his free hand in the air.

The floor creaks behind him and Rey's voice softly breaks the silence, "I can hear you thinking from the bedroom, flyboy."

Poe turns slightly and gives her a tired smile. "Sorry, didn't mean to wake you," he replies and Rey shakes her head.

"You didn't," she reassures him, walking forward quickly so she can tuck herself under his free arm and curl against his side. "He's going to need to eat soon and," she gestures vaguely at her chest, "I'm getting sore."

"Sorry," Poe apologies unnecessarily and kisses the side of Rey's head. They both look down at the baby, fidgeting more in his sleep. "We really made a good one, huh?"

Rey's eyes get watery and she nods. "He's perfect. I really never - I didn't think I'd get to have this with you," she whispers, clinging to his loose sleep shirt.

"I'm glad we did though," Poe replies quietly, blinking a little to clear the tears from his eyes. "Wouldn't have wanted this with anyone else, Sunshine."

Bey grunts softly in his crib, beginning to stir awake. Rey grins down at him and swoops in, easily lifting him into her arms with a coo, "Oh, my little love, you're so precious." She cradles him securely in her arms, gently tugging down the neck of her oversized, borrowed shirt. Bey latches on with a practiced ease and Rey winces slightly at the sensation. It's still so unfamiliar. She makes her way to the glider chair in the corner, sitting down carefully so she doesn't jostle Bey.

Poe watches and then drops to sit on the floor next to the chair, kicking out a bare foot to gently rock the chair back and forth. Rey looks down at him and smiles a quiet thanks, the movement already making her sleepy. She leans her head back against the headrest and looks down at Bey with such pure love it almost makes Poe want to look away, as if he's intruding on something private. He doesn't though - instead he watches them both with the same unadulterated love.

Softly, Poe starts humming a Yavinese lullaby that he remembers his mom singing when he was growing up. Rey looks over at him and beams, whispering, "that's beautiful, Poe," while stroking Bey's cheek.

"So're you," he replies with a cheeky wink, ducking slightly to avoid the stuffed Loth-cat Rey lobs at his head. Still smiling, Poe returns to his humming, occasionally singing when he remembers the words. Both mother and son are quickly falling back to sleep as Poe continues and it's an adorable sight to behold. Eventually, they're both asleep in the chair, Bey's cheek squished against Rey's breast and milk dribbling out of his mouth.

Poe snorts and stands, knees creaking a little, so he can carefully take Bey into his arms. The baby rouses a bit, long enough for Poe to burp him, before shutting his eyes and passing out again. Poe smiles down at the sleeping infant, settling him in the crib and whispering, "_dulces sueños, mijo_." Bey lets out a soft little snore and Poe just about melts even more. Maker, this kid is cute.

Behind him, Rey snores gently, her head tilting sideways so that her cheek nearly touches the top of her shoulder. Poe's heart bursts with love for his wife and he carefully pulls her shirt (stolen from him) back over her chest and gathers her into his arms. Even with the few leftover pounds from her pregnancy, Rey weighs nearly nothing. She's warm and soft in his arms.

"I can walk," she murmurs sleepily into his neck, nuzzling close like a Tooka kitten.

"I know," he mumbles back, kissing the top of her head, "but I've got you,_ mi amor_. Just relax."

Rey hums against his skin and Poe's entire body shivers. He'll never stop being amazed at what her presence does to him.

"Bey's asleep?" she slurs, growing heavier in his arms as she gets closer to falling back asleep.

Poe settles her on her side of the bed and Rey automatically curls up, reaching blindly for the blanket. He laughs and tugs it up, covering her legs and chest and smoothing a hand over her hair. "Bey's asleep," he confirms, "now go to bed."

"Mmm," Rey mumbles incoherently, her face pressed into the pillow. She reaches out for his hand and lazily brings it to her mouth to kiss his palm. "Love you," she sighs, sinking into the mattress.

Poe climbs onto his side of the bed and curls his body around Rey's - her back flush against his chest. He kisses the soft skin behind her ear and whispers back, "I love you, Sunshine."

They have maybe another three Standard hours before Bey needs to be fed again, if they're lucky, but sleep isn't coming for Poe just yet. He can't stop thinking about how lucky he is - how blessed by the Force he is - for his survival and Rey's survival and Bey's existence. His arm tightens involuntarily around Rey's waist and he buries his face in her hair, a few stray tears leaking from his eyes.

He's so kriffing lucky.

* * *

_a/n: an anon on tumblr requested poe watching the baby sleep and rey finding him, so this is the result! i'm coming off of post-disney trip sadness, so it's all stra wars all the time for me lol_

_i have tons of fics i'm writing and editing, so i can't wait to share!_


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